Hey there Beloved.

therefinementoflove:

To everyone who just blew up my inbox saying all manner of rude and angry things about me because of my last reply concerning whether I would date or marry a non-Christian…
please stop throwing accusations of discrimination. Some of you asked what if I really, really loved him? Well then, that would be awesome, but I don’t think I’m going to fall that deeply in love with someone who isn’t in love with God, because to me, that’s the singlemost attractive quality in a guy. Seeing a guy whose heart is completely abandon to his Creator and the Gospel hits me in a way that ‘attraction’ does not describe, because it’s something purer, realer, higher than what is found in just thinking someone is good-looking, them being devoted to you and taking good care of you, the two of you being able to share your thoughts and secrets, etc. I can’t describe it, so I’m not going to even try. The reason I would not date a non-Christian is because I don’t date for fun. Why play with someone’s heart (and let them have pieces of yours) if you don’t see it going anywhere? And I wouldn’t be able to marry a guy who doesn’t love God without feeling like I was missing out on a lot.

As for my faith not being a valid reason to decide whether or not to be with someone, it’s a perfectly valid reason. God is the most important thing in my life and I want whomever I’m with to share that. Some girls choose or reject a guy based on things like whether or not he’s in a band, or if he would be classified as a hipster, a nerd, or a goth, whether he shares their love of dance or nature or whatever else. I’m a horrible person to choose or reject someone based on whether or not he understands and shares the most important thing in my life with me? I mean, how can you justify someone who wants to be with another person that is as obsessed with music as they themselves are, and condemn me for wanting to be with someone who is as obsessed with my Savior as I?

I want to be able to pray with my husband. I want him to understand when I say, “God shared something with me today.” I want to be with someone who is concerned with eternal matters over money, status, objects, and other trivial things that only last as long as this life. I want to be with a man who shares my vision for ministry, who can teach me things about God and loves me in a way that a man can only when he understands how Christ loves His bride, the Church. I want to marry a man who will live a life of worship with me. Without that, I would be immensely lonely. I can’t imagine spending the rest of my life with someone whom I knew was not following God’s plan for him and our family. I can’t imagine always praying alone, going to church alone or with just my children, agonizing over the soul of the one I love, never being able to join them in worshiping our Creator.

While I will not say that I could not romantically love someone who does not share my faith, I can certainly say I would never be able to love them in a certain way. There is a love that is deeper than normal human affection, a love that is reached only by two people who are completely in love with and immersed in God. It’s beautiful, nothing earthly will ever be able to compare to it, and it’s what I want in a relationship. I will state again for the record that I have dated outside of my faith, so I’m not just saying this because it’s what I’m supposed to say… it’s not that I think everyone else is a heathen without any great or admirable qualities/intentions. I really do want to be with someone who understands and shares my love for God, and I know that’s what God wants for me as well. I have loved those who are not Christians in the past, and I’m sure I could do it again, but I don’t want to miss out on something much more beautiful that only God can provide through a man who loves Him. God bless.

^^THIS^^